you know what song ive had stuck in my head for like 2 days? the first single from jessica simpson. i wanna love you forever. i like it. its such a good song. i wonder if anyone has that CD or single. cause i want it.
i should be reading, but i dont know if i want to. im so lazy and its been such a crappy couple of weeks. i love my roommate ashley cause she listens and gives me advice and is a wonderful person. and yeah i thank her. but yeah, last night was a major fun talking and discussing and crying night. it was good. cause i got a lot of stuff that i wanted to say out in the open.
btw. first day of clinical over!! loved it. me and cassie got to watch an iV be put in this lady. she was so nice about it. and my patient was totally cool and tolally healthy!! which was amazingly awesome.
im just very confused about everything. but i shouldnt be..i hate runing my life..*sigh* ash asked me if i needed to be single for awhile. and i didnt know what to say. i just never thought...

if you love me, don't tell me, the feeling will pass...if you still love me, fight the feeling, its not worth it...

sometimes in order for things to work out you just need to let everything go. im so glad i let go of people that were keeping me down and making me sad and making me cry. i remember when i used to go to mo and nicole every night and just tell them all the horrible and bad things and mean and neglectful things other people would do to me. i feel a whole lot better this semester in terms of new friends. ive been hanging out with new people and just trying to make my current loving and wonderful relationships better and much much stronger. because those people have supported me so much and ive really just been getting a lot closer to other people. its been great. im SO much more happier. what the fuck was i thinking the previous 3 semesters. i must have been so blind to think that i was happy. its not like i had ANY fun whatsoever. im so glad i let go of people..well not just one person, several. its so obvious to everyone the newfound happiness which i am experiencing.

NEXT!

bad bad bad week. but i found out one of my friends in the nursing program is PREGNANT!!!!!!! and another one of my friends, also in the nursing program, IS ENGAGED!! her ring is so gorgeous!! oh i am so jealous...

EVEN MORE INTERESTING!!

so yeah..i'll only be able to take one dance class a week with this new schedule. i changed out of my 12:30 class so i could be in katie's class and so i wouldnt have to be in class with regina. hey its the truth. but i totally screwed myself over cause now i miss my dance class..which is really pissing me off. i loved that class. *sigh* i guess daisy will be like..oh..there goes another student. im so sad! i love her classes!!! 2 days a week!! even if i left class right away i wouldnt be able to make it for anything cause my class gets out AT 6:30!!! BITCHTASTIC. gag me with a spoon or something, please. i end of sacrificing my favorite class at 6:30 just so i wont have to be with regina in a class and i can be with katie in that class. damnit. the decisions people make to have katie in a class and not just be completely irritated for 3 hours. and theres only like..6 people in my class now, but like we dont even get out early!!!!!!!!! ARGH!! i hate people without a passion for dance..anyone who doesnt can just die!! so frustrating..SO FRUSTRATING!!! nfre834n4 835th84t HATE MY LIFE.

MORE GOOD NEWS!!!

so since i didnt waste my summer sitting on my flat..i mean fat ass..and i actually went to summer school..i am now on my way to obtaining a minor in psychology. without all the psych classes i have to take with nursing anyways..i only need 5 more units. so theres a social psych class and a psychology of death and dying class. WOW amazing what one summer of 6 units can get you. glad i wasnt lazing around on my ass and just going to the mall all day..haha that would have been sad! and even if i cant get the minor, i have a 5 unit leeway if i fail a class i can make it up and STILL not be behind the rest of my nursing classes!! wow. one summer of work will do wonders for your ego..=)

gotta love life..especially when it rains..
the rain reminds me of a lot. first of all when i used to swim in the rain during the spring for practice. one time in particular, it was the first time i had swam in the rain in the summer. i think i was about 11ish. it was already maybe august, so i guess it was a random time to rain. my dad had just taken my sister and i to big 5 to go buy swim caps and we were on our way to practice. then on the way to logan it began raining..hard! and it was so exciting thinking i was gonna swim in the rain. my sister and i had been on the team for exactly 3/4ths of the summer season, and this was the first season i had swam. i dunno, i just remember it was so much fun. the water was warm, and everytime we came up to breathe the cold rain would hit our faces..it was fun..water all around us.
today i went to health restoration from 9:25-11:45..long long long class..2.5 hours!! then katie, koleena, adrian, and i ate lunch, well i ate lunch with them =). i got a quesadilla and pepsi..the most healthy lunch ever. then i went to the registrar's office to add/drop but they said i had to talk to dottie or mary anne to add/drop..which sucks..then i went to my room and ran into mo who had another present for me. love that girl!!!!! awesome..most awesome ever..then me and her had a great heart to heart talk about people and our relationships and friends and the future..overall, very enlightening. so then i had cheer and kamee my love picked me up cause it was raining, and we went to the gym. and we practiced for 2 hours. well..almost. =) we're a bit unruly..hahaha. then after cheer kamee dropped me off and i finished my paper and took a nice hot shower which i so greatly deserved. then i went to nicole's to talk about my most favorite subject ever.weddings.. i dunno. its fun helping her with ideas and planning and everything. =) but yeah that was great. i really should be reading pharmacology, but im lazy..

i love e-mails from my family. well..the ones that know..but read this and BEWARE!! =) i was like OH NO!! when i read it..hahahahah

17 Warning Signs of a Bad Boyfriend
You know the guy you're thinking about marrying is wrong for you if he has no friends, your siblings don't like him, and his credit history doesn't check out. Sometimes the best words of wisdom don't come from academics or scientists with impressive titles and educational credentials. Sometimes the best advice comes from people who have been there and done that. Such is the case with a recent letter published in the syndicated Dear Abby advice column that listed 17 signs that your boyfriend is NOT the one you should marry.

A married woman who said her husband now wanted a divorce passed along tips for the not-yet-married. If you see these red flags, she advises, dump the guy:
1. If your parents or siblings have doubts about him, pay attention. Listen and check it out.
2. If your intended has nothing good to say about his ex, beware. This is a pattern. Divorce is rarely only one person's fault.
3. If his children have nothing to do with him, do not believe him if he says his ex brainwashed them against him.
4. Look closely at his credit and job history. They are sure predictors of what your life will be like.
5. If he's over 30 and has no money, do not let him move in with you, and don't marry him until he's financially solvent. If he has any respect for you (and himself), he'll insist on it.
6. Be sure in your heart that you can live with him AS IS. You cannot change another person.
7. Beware if he has no friends. It is not true that they all chose to side with his ex.
8. If your friends dislike him, pay attention. This is also true if he hates your friends.
9.If he has more than one DUI and still drinks, run!
10. If he is one personality at work or with others, and another person alone with you, run.
11. If he has nothing to do with his parents, investigate why. Don't take his word for it.
12. If he's an expert at everything and brags a lot, understand that he will turn off a lot of people, eventually maybe even you.
13. If he has sexual problems, go with him to a doctor before you marry him. Believe me, his problem will become your problem.
14. If he is emotionally or verbally abusive, it will only get worse. Yelling, name-calling and glowering are classic signs of an abuser.
15. If he is never wrong and never apologizes, everything will be "your fault" forever. And after years of hearing it, you may even start to accept the blame.
16. If he does something wrong and says, "That wouldn't have happened if you hadn't ( )," that's another sign of an abuser.
17. And if he's mean to children, pets or animals, recognize that he's pathological, and the next victim could be you.

this weekend was a wonderful wonderful time for me. hhmm..well friday night me and katie and her sister and adrian ordered pizza and watched shrek 2!! fun fun fun! then after that i went to sleep. the on saturday i talked with my sister online with her webcam. it was great great fun. its snowing there and i got to see her loft/studio apartment. then i was whining about school and she said she'll help me and stuff. then after that greg came then he wanted food so we went to go get food at safewak and mcdonalds and a&w. then we got back and we watched THE CLUB MOVIE!! THE DIVINE SECRETS OF THE YA-YA SISTERHOOD!! oh love that movie. i miss the club so much. aaawww. watching movies at nicoles..eating at krystles..doing nothing at my house? going to the beach. yeah then we went to bed. then we all woke up at like 11 and we watched more movies and tv then we got ready to go out to eat. and we ate at chili's with our favorite waitress ASHLEY!!! hahaha wonderful..wonderful..then greg and i watched meet the fockers. it was okay..not THAT funny..but funny. haha i took greg out this weekend cause he took me out last weekend. oh..btw..i got gifts from him! i got a guess watch..silver guess earrings..dangly blue earrings..and a shirt from guess..its pretty and blue..something ashley would wear hehehe..and yeah. i loved all of my gifts..oh bless greg's heart. =) hahahah..thats it thought. nothing else really happened. but i had a wonderful weekend. thank you my love..

Slow down you crazy child
You're so ambitious for a juvenile
But then if you're so smart
Tell me why are you are still so afraid?
Where's the fire, what's the hurry about?
You better cool it off before you burn it out
You got so much to do
And only so many hours in a day
But you know that when the truth is told
That you can get what you want or you can just get old
You're gonna kick off
Before you even get halfway through
When will you realize
Vienna waits for you
Slow down you're doing fine
You can't be everything you want to be before your time
Although it's so romantic
On the borderline tonight
Too bad but it's the life you lead
You're so ahead of yourself that you forget what you need
Though you can see when you're wrong
You know you can't always see when you're right
You've got your passion, you've got your pride
But don't you know only fools are satisfied?
Dream on
But don't imagine they'll all come true
When will you realize
Vienna waits for you
Slow down you crazy child
Take the phone off the hook and disappear for a while
It's alright
You can afford to lose a day or two
When will you realize...
Vienna waits for you.