okay well life sucks..im so stupid..god i hate this..this always happens to me..i dont think i deserve to be crying over crap like this..i just dont need this..i was perfectly happy til this..then i thought it was extra happy..but then something else happened..and now im just confused. so..i've decided to just forget everyting until one gives way..or seomthing happens..im not gonna call or do anything out of my way.. i know i should make an effort..but all good things come in good time..so im in a bad mood..and nothing but crying seems to help..im such an idiot..why do i give a damn? i shouldnt..i shouldnt..all this..im making a big deal about it..but thats what i do..right? make a big deal out of everything..right? miss drama teeny..yeah well..not all the time am i being so damn dramatic.. so yeah..lets talking about something that isnt about stupid crap..the musical..Les Mis rules..hehe..i get to do the makeup and help dress people in their costumes..help with mics..and stuff..i dunno if i get to even watch it because im really too lazy to train someone to do all my crap..so i guess i wont watch it..im tired of all the lies and the games..and i dont wanna get involved..but yeah back to the musical..afterwards we went to meet the fans..we saw o'down there..they loved it..cause we rule..well our musical does..our vocalists are amazing!! i love them so much! hehehe speaking of singers..al..haha..the 'love of my life' hahahaha...i was hugging him like i always do..and mike saw us..and then in class he was like..are you an al going out? and i was like..hahaha...no..then he said..do you like him? and i was like..NO...then mike was like..do you want to go out with him? and i was like..uuumm..no..no hun i dont not like him, nor do i want go out with him, nor am i going out with him. it was quite funny..i love al! he's great..yeah back to tonight..i do the make up costumes hair and whetever else needs to be done..im such a stage mom..hehe my kid is so gonna be pampered..heheh..if i have kids..with the way my life is going now..im pretty sure im gonna feel like killing myself before i even get to go to college..so yeah..then afterwards we were outside having the o'down people praise us..(hehe very good for the ego) and yes...we were bragging about dive in..which krystle claire and i created! woot woot..we're great..and yesthen i walked nicole and tiffany to thair cars..and i was telling them about my bad day..but then i remembered i had to get something for one of the costumes..so i went back in..but then i went back outside and i went to talk to this guy that i met this year..he's in my analysis class..his name is mark..he's high-larious..he also has sars..poor guy..heheh.. and when i was running to my car...cause it was raining like hella hard..and he's like her christine.. and i was like hi! who did you come to see? and he was like you! and i said aaww..how cute!! thanks hun..but i wasnt in it..i only did the hair and makeup and costumes and everything else that needed to be done..hehe but he was like..those were great too! hehe and i was like..thanks! he's the only person to ever thank me for today and yesterday's work..so i was like yay someone appreciates me! and then he was like..here..and he gave me a rose! it was so pretty cause it was raining and it had raindrops on it..very nice..hehe and yeah..so i said thanks and got into my car and left..and that was nice..and as i was driving home i was thinking..about all this stuff..which is nothing..and i was like so mad i was screaming out loud in my car..and now my throat hurts..and i was crying and crying..and i was like..this shouldnt matter..it shouldnt..so it doesnt..and i dont want to have anything to do with it..i say things i mean when im mad..i really do..and i even held myself back..but i just hear SO MANY THINGS!! and i dont wanna go there..i really dont..there is a very bad bad dark place for teeny..she cant survive there..so yeah..im sorry ive been mean..but really..you bastards brought that upon yourselves..you shouldnt tell me things i want to hear when i already almost have something i want..